Sunday, November 21, 2004
Ah! Listen not to this fool! He has lost his mind! It's the cold. I mean, it isn't the cold! Because we're not in Antarctica! We are still where we were before, wherever that was.
In fact, out headquarters has grown slightly! The introduction of so many exclamation marks has pushed the walls out into the streets! At least, it would, if there were any streets in Antarctica. Um... hehehehe!!!!!!! Brains!
So no changing service, you naughty little customers!
In fact, out headquarters has grown slightly! The introduction of so many exclamation marks has pushed the walls out into the streets! At least, it would, if there were any streets in Antarctica. Um... hehehehe!!!!!!! Brains!
So no changing service, you naughty little customers!
Thursday, July 08, 2004
Oh no you don't!
On this note, we are welcoming our first 50 - yes, 50! - customers onto the FFIS!* We hope that this will become a long and lucrative relationship, lucrative being the more important of the two I'd say but who knows? DCM's pay has been withdrawn for a short time** while he is disciplined*** for his blatant misuse of company funds****.
*The "co-erced at gunpoint" detail is unimportant at this time. If you think otherwise, take it up with our crack team of armed lawyers.
**2 years
***With 7-foot electrified, sharpened, poisoned sticks
****Yes, we DO have funds, damn you!
On this note, we are welcoming our first 50 - yes, 50! - customers onto the FFIS!* We hope that this will become a long and lucrative relationship, lucrative being the more important of the two I'd say but who knows? DCM's pay has been withdrawn for a short time** while he is disciplined*** for his blatant misuse of company funds****.
*The "co-erced at gunpoint" detail is unimportant at this time. If you think otherwise, take it up with our crack team of armed lawyers.
**2 years
***With 7-foot electrified, sharpened, poisoned sticks
****Yes, we DO have funds, damn you!
Tuesday, July 06, 2004
Well, just a minor update. We don't do major ones, as you may have noticed.
Our grand total of customers now stands at the massive 0. Zero. The fantastic security, speed and reliability of our network has drawn no-one to its warm embrace. Frankly, I'm annoyed. So annoyed I'm going to drown my sorrows in drink, using the company funds. At least, if there were any, I would.
So, If you love us, email. Send us money. We want drink.
Our grand total of customers now stands at the massive 0. Zero. The fantastic security, speed and reliability of our network has drawn no-one to its warm embrace. Frankly, I'm annoyed. So annoyed I'm going to drown my sorrows in drink, using the company funds. At least, if there were any, I would.
So, If you love us, email. Send us money. We want drink.
Saturday, May 01, 2004
IT'S FASCISM, YOU USELESS SLAVES.
...
Oops.
...
Oops.
Wednesday, April 14, 2004
Updates???? BLASPHEMY!!!!
The stoning continues, even in Estonia... Help us lord. They've broken into the Secure connection safe. We're doomed!
The stoning continues, even in Estonia... Help us lord. They've broken into the Secure connection safe. We're doomed!
Saturday, March 06, 2004
Inept, the lot of you.
Friday, February 13, 2004
We at the Flatfish Interlegs Service apologise for our absence in the past months - Unfortunatly we were unable to access the internet due to the ineptitude of our employees *namely, rob*
